Can you change your personality by improving your social skills?


The withdrawn personality does not cause harm to those around it and does not infringe on the rights of others.

The feeling of “unreactive” or “non-social” person is painful and unpleasant, and it provokes many internal dialogues with himself, that is, dissatisfaction with himself and what is going on around him. hard situation.

But is it possible to change ourselves if we are determined to do so? And we take the hardest path to change and leave the easy field, which is to withdraw and move away from life? About this, Al Jazeera Net interviewed specialists to find out how to improve our social skills.


Withdrawal personality disorder

The psychiatrist, Dr. Alaa Al-Lahham, defines personality as a set of permanent emotional, intellectual and behavioral traits in an individual, which determine the way he deals with himself, others, and his surrounding environment.

There are personality disorders that make a person unable to adapt to his surroundings, and cause him difficulties at the level of feelings, social relationships and his ability to engage in society.

Al-Lahham shows that there are many types of personality disorders, including: narcissism and antisocial personality, and the case we are talking about is withdrawal personality disorder.

He explains to Al Jazeera Net, "This character does not cause harm to those around her and does not infringe the rights of others, and she is a character who treats people with respect, but she takes the withdrawal as a defensive mechanism to avoid anxiety and falling into embarrassing situations, and she is always afraid of people's evaluation of her or mocking her."


Cognitive-behavioral therapy

Dr. Al-Lahham says, “The drug intervention has limited effect on personality disorders, but it is used when there are other accompanying psychological disorders such as: anxiety or depression, and the most appropriate course of intervention is the course of cognitive-behavioral therapy, which aims to modify the intellectual and behavioral aspects of those who suffer from this disorder.”

He adds that cognitive-behavioral therapy is based on a triad (feelings, thoughts, behavior). There are deep-rooted human thoughts and convictions that were formed by several factors, including the genetic factor, childhood and adolescence experiences, and the surrounding environment from family, school, friends and social media.


He continues: These deep-rooted convictions may be negative, such as "I am weak, I am a failure, I do not deserve respect, I am unable to express my opinion in front of people" and others, and accordingly, when a certain situation triggers these convictions, feelings such as distress, anxiety and depression are generated, It prompts the person to take a behavior, which in this psychological disorder is called "withdrawal".

According to this psychologist, the therapist breaks this cycle of feelings, thoughts, and behavior, and targets each element. There is no magic solution to the withdrawal disorder, but the most important factor is turning withdrawal from situations into confrontation, participating in social events of joys and sorrows, and exercising, And learning the skills of public speaking and public speaking, and staying away as much as possible from the environment of constant criticism and defamation, all this is done through cognitive-behavioral therapy.


Foster community

For his part, sociologist Dr. Hussein Mahadin believes that society gives people religious and social legitimacy, and thus the personalities, skills and temperament of children are formed according to their general natures and personality, and collective behaviors can be observed while individuals practice rituals of joy or frowns or even openness to others or withdrawing from them.

He adds: Thus, it can be said that the personality and traits of children of both sexes in terms of openness or withdrawal are shaped according to the natures of their society, and their personalities are shaped according to the personality of their parents. In social life since their childhood in the family, then the circle of interaction expands to school and then to life.

There is no magic solution for withdrawal personality disorder, but the most important factor is to turn withdrawal from situations into confrontation  
There is no magic bullet for withdrawing personality disorder, but the most important thing is to convert withdrawal from situations to confronting.

Based on these data, Mahadin adds, an individual, a man or a woman, can modify his behavior in a more open manner, based on his desire and sense of the importance and expediency of adopting the amendment, especially if he begins to mature in terms of his mental flexibility, his independence in thinking and practice from his family environment (childhood experiences), specifically His parents, who formed his role model, and this applies to work friends or university study companions, for example.

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